If: A poem on learning to be a man

• If (with Kipling's blessings)

• If you can measure yourself
• with the eye scales of the woman
• who survived your enemy

• If you can hold the woman
• you had leaned into until she warmed
• and, looking into her eyes, say
• why you are afraid

• If you can walk out of the shadow
• of your father's failing,
• your mother's distress,
• and then if you can turn to the cleansing heat
• of summer sun and make a vow
• to care a little less

• If you can make flowers flower
• on poisoned land
• and kiss every fruit

• If you can shut up
• about a woman's dress when
• you do not hope to wear it

Photo: AFP

• If you can mutely nod
• when women speak of what is done
• in your name

• If you can say,
• never again!
• and mean it

• If you can stare deep into the well
• of your heart and drink
• up your twisted truths
• and speak, though aflame
• with shame
• If you can build the grand things
• that feed your hate

• If you can cook the animals
• your ancestors ate

• If you can smile at neighbours
• who will not cease their cry of 'apart! apart!'
• and invite them in every weekend
• for their antidote of art

• If you can build a school
• where all-all-all is the norm

• If you can build a storm shelter
• for lovers on the run

• If you can take the place of sons
• murdered for the wrong hat
• or those mothers stripped and paraded
• for living with their pride intact

• If you can learn to dance
• just because no one dances
• any more

• If you can sing the song
• of the weak when their throats
• are too sore

• If you can hear the howls outside
• and step out,
• armed or not

• If you can turn away from
• those videos of the naked
• and the harmed

• If you can rally against those
• who trade off your will
• for wealth

• If you can force your vote to translate
• into water, hope and health

• If you can let the gods be,
• One or many or all,
• let them speak from themselves
• from above

• You will have learnt to be a man,
• my brother, my friend, my love.

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