Why modern relationships are losing their meaning and value
Does the word "commitment" freak you out? Perhaps, it conjures up images of lifetime imprisonment without the option of parole: like a rabbit in a trap, being enslaved to a woman with her fancies and whims forever or maybe like deer caught in the headlights of a car?
Obviously, you are scared of the "C" word or possess an irrational fear for it. In short, you are commitment phobic.
What is commitment phobia?
Coined in 1987 in the renowned self-help book Men Who Can't Love, commitment phobia is the flash of fright that restrains a person from progressing to the next step of a relationship or committing in a relationship. It is one of the most universal phobias which worries the typical love life of a couple.
In essence, it is the concern of long-term affairs that, in a flip, cause the evasion of eternal relationships and even marriage. Not long ago, as compared to women, men were by and large considered to be a bunch of commitment phobic people. However, studies and research have now confirmed that commitment phobia is not gender-specific and can have an outcome for both women and men equally.
Astonishingly, the irony here is that those affected by commitment phobia scurry off at the sight of the very things they are frightened of: intimate attachment and long-term love. It is mostly the concern of making poor choices besides the worry of losing one's own identity that results in the commitment-phobic folk acting unpredictably.
They, therefore, walk out of their established relationships and hurt their spouse.
A matter of concern
Responsibility, assurance and promise are the three vital traits that are connected with the term commitment.
A healthy relationship always demands unconditional love, constant care and nurture from both the lovers. However, with relationships losing their meaning and value, commitment issues are on the rise in this modern age and are being real deal breakers of a healthy relationship.
Panic due to commitment arises because people usually think that by giving long-term commitment to their partner, they are going to get away from their freedom and, perhaps, even lose their own space.
They believe that from now on their life will be ruled by their partners.
The idea of spending an entire lifetime with one person scares the hell out of them. On the other hand, some individuals have genuine commitment issues having dated the wrong or bad people in the past. Some might have even been cheated by a spouse.
However, being commitment-phobic will not only ruin your love life but also have a disastrous effect on your personal life. If you have started noticing that your fears of commitment have turned into a phobia that costs your happiness, there are ways to overcome them.
Change your attitude: Stop thinking that being single or not committing to someone is cool. Being committed doesn't imply that you are trapped or emasculated. It means that you are blessed with a woman who loves you immensely and respects you for who you are.
It's always better to wake up every day with the same partner, knowing she/he loves you rather than having a different date every night - which is misleading and even irksome.
Change your mindset: Neither is every girl a cheat nor is she behind your money. Look for a girl who is perfect for you and for a healthy relationship. Take your time. Get to know her better and who knows you'll end up committing to her - leaving behind all your fears.
Talk openly: Talk openly with your partner about how you feel about dealing with relationship problems. Never hurt your partner by damaging your relationship with evil tactics or by bailing out on her. You may forget about the relationship or her, but she won't be able to forget you for the rest of her life. When you are breaking up with a girl, at least give her a thoughtful justification as to why you are ending things.
Take risks: Last but not the least, get out of the comfort zone, release all your fears, give deeper meaning to your life, overcome all your suspicions and finally: don't be commitment phobic.
Treasure your relationship and give it the right direction. You never know when your lack of commitment can actually cause a lack of happiness in your otherwise lovely relationship.