DailyOh! Is sex safe during Covid-19, to why Dennis Rodman is Kim Jong-un’s best buddy
China did not find it but the world has found the virus in semen too.
Today morning was just like yesterday morning – harbinger of bad news. Sixteen migrant workers who were walking back from Gujarat to their homes in Madhya Pradesh last night fell asleep due to exhaustion in Aurangabad. They never woke up. A goods train crushed them in their sleep. Guess who else hasn’t woken up? The government. There is a sleep of exhaustion and then there is one of apathy. The crisis facing the migrant workers surfaced right on March 24 when Lockdown 1.0 kicked in. The government ducked in thinking the problem will blow over, only it blew into its face full blast.
The customary condolence messages have been pouring in on Twitter. Prime Minister Narendra Modi has said the deaths have left him anguished and that “all possible assistance required is being provided”. Only, the dead need no assistance. Assistance for the dead is nothing but atonement for those alive.
Extremely anguished by the loss of lives due to the rail accident in Aurangabad, Maharashtra. Have spoken to Railway Minister Shri Piyush Goyal and he is closely monitoring the situation. All possible assistance required is being provided.
— Narendra Modi (@narendramodi) May 8, 2020
But some aren’t seeking even that atonement. They are insulting the dead by asking, “Why were they sleeping on the tracks?” This bunch of Covidiots is an assembly of callous Covidiots but their question must be answered.
They were sleeping on the tracks because unlike the Twitterati, they did not have cosy beds and couches to spend the night on. We are not even talking about Twitter accounts that could have helped them stay awake scrolling through their timelines and notice the train coming to crush them.
They walk on the tracks because police block the roads, question and harass them.
— KS????BANA (@kamleshksingh) May 8, 2020
Why not sleep on the roadside then? Because that’s where the police are. Beating people with lathis because ‘assistance’ can always be provided posthumously, much like awards.
Who told them to sleep on tracks???? #Aurangabad pic.twitter.com/LbcO6jIAsx
— Sagar Lohatkar (@sagarlohatkar) May 8, 2020
With that question settled, we hope migrants can sleep where they want but Modi’s tweet had a key takeaway - the country still has a Railways Minister in the form of Piyush Goyal. We were just beginning to forget.
The country has an Aviation Minister too - Hardeep Singh Puri. He is seeing to the repatriation of Indians stuck overseas. That project is called Vande Bharat. There is no name for the project to send migrants home because there is no such project. Some trains have been pressed into service, but the fact that people are dying on tracks that were supposed to see trains taking migrants home running on them tells us why the project has no name.
Indians stuck abroad, meanwhile, are coming home to India. Over 1,90,000 people are likely to be repatriated under project Vande Bharat in the first phase. Not just flights, even ships are assisting in the project. Will there be a second phase? Yes. Even a third and fourth, but that would be later. For now, only those in distress overseas are being repatriated. Why? The answer may lie in the meaning of repatriation. Repatriation, our Word Of The Day, originates in the Latin word ‘repatriare’, where ‘re’ means back and ‘patria’ stands for native land. The call of the native land in moments of distress is heightened. If you are dancing and drinking where you are, why would you miss where you came from? That is why those stuck abroad must come home. That is why migrant workers should have been sent home when the lockdown began.
You can say this was an unprecedented problem and that the world was caught unaware. One part of this statement is true. The other part says the problem was unleashed upon the world by China who knew about the problem and could have stopped the spread. But it doesn’t matter what you say because Kim Jong-un has praised Chinese President Xi Jinping in “getting its coronavirus epidemic under control”. Before you say why should Kim’s opinion matter over yours, remind yourself how frantically you had been looking for signs of his death and life just a week ago. The man has great amusement and entertainment value. Donald Trump is trying to get there, but he is still a long way away.
We won’t get started on Trump because we have already started on Kim. Now, Kim may or may not really have liked what Xi did in epidemic control – turning it into a pandemic – but he had to say it because, well, they are friends. Perhaps, the only friend Xi has at the moment is Kim (reports suggest he is being hauled over the coals within his own party) but Kim has other friends too. Surprised? Haven’t you heard – upar wale ne har kisi ke liye koi na koi banaya hai? Dennis Rodman is that ‘koi’ for Kim.
NBA player Rodman was a basketball diplomat of sorts to North Korea. Now Kim knows as much about diplomacy as Xi about epidemic control, but Rodman found favour because basketball was one of Kim’s favourite sports.
In fact when Trump met Kim in Singapore in 2018, Rodman was in Singapore as a facilitator. Kim has never tried to hide his contempt for America and Americans, but it’s different with Rodman. Rodman is one of the very few Westerners to have met Kim. Rodman has in fact visited North Korea several times since 2013. You may have never tried to go to North Korea, but those who have will tell you it is impossible unless Kim wants you to come. Among the many things that Rodman has done to deserve this friendship is defend Kim and North Korea's infringements on human rights.
Be that as it may, we have got some news from Bollywood about an upcoming venture. Given the uncertainty of the times we live in, it is difficult to say when the upcoming is coming but there are rumours that exes Deepika Padukone and Ranbir Kapoor could be seen together in Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s Baiju Bawra, which will be based on Baiju the music maestro who challenged Tansen for a musical duel in emperor Akbar’s court.
But how did Baiju become bawra? It all begins with the death of Baiju’s father, for which he blames Tansen. The revenge tale gets more venoumous when a love triangle is formed with Baiju and Tansen as two of its angles. Baiju learns music to avenge the hurt and the father’s killing. We cannot vouch for the order of precedence here. Having armed himself with the art of music, Baiju arrives in Tansen’s city and goes around town singing for a whole day. No matter how melodious you sound, if you won’t stop, people will question your sanity. People thus began calling him bawra. Now the good thing about being bawra is that you do not care what anyone calls you. Baiju is arrested and the only condition to save his life is that he defeat Tansen in the musical duel. Who wins the duel and the third angle? Wait for the movie and if you can’t, watch Vijay Bhatt's Baiju Bawra (1952).
You can watch because there is not much to do these days anyway because of the third phase of lockdown or the first phase of relaxations – whichever way you see it. Recent studies suggest even sex can lead to the transmission of coronavirus. Now, we told that to you in March because WHO said there is not much clarity on the issue. That was also because initial studies were conducted in China and the country said there was no evidence of the virus in semen. There is little evidence of credibility in all things Chinese. But studies in other parts of the world confirm the presence of the virus in semen too.
Much about this virus is uncertain and remains to be found but what has been confirmed is that pop superstar Madonna caught the virus, actually the virus caught her, in France towards the end of her famous tour Madam Xtour, which started in September 2019 and ended in March 2020. The tour got a USD 10 million (Rs 75,64,00,000) start with its Brooklyn Theater shows.
But did you know that Madonna moved from Detroit to New York with just USD 35 in her pocket? That was when she was 18. She is now 61. We are glad she has recovered from Covid-19.
Here’s a glimpse of what the tour was like:
We will leave you with that for the weekend. See you on Monday.