AR Rehman’s daughter wearing the veil is her choice. But it's still a hugely regressive one
'Choice' is a misleading term. While choice appears to be an expression of free will, it can cover up the fact that 'will' itself is not always free but is guided by umpteen factors, including one’s environment, social conditioning and moulding.
#ARRehman’s daughter wearing the veil is her choice. But it's still a hugely regressive one | @Vandana5 | https://t.co/4eRxLntUlk #hijab #khatija pic.twitter.com/Qmuja7ihSw
— DailyO (@DailyO_) February 7, 2019
This ambiguity, around what choice actually stands for in life, has blurred the lines between what women are forced to do and what they do out of their ‘free will’.
Our choices can be forced on us in the name of tradition, in the name of customs and, most importantly, in the name of religion.
When a group of women justified the ban on women of menstruating age from entering the Sabarimala shrine, saying they themselves would not visit the deity till they attained menopause, they were seemingly voicing a choice they had made. Dig a bit deeper though and we know that these women are themselves part of a patriarchal set-up, so institutionalised in them that they begin to not just follow it, but also perpetuate it without ever questioning.
The ghunghat, sindoor, mangalsutra, the many fasts women keep for the well-being of their husbands and male children are nothing but the perpetuation of patriarchy through the active involvement of women. Many are forced to take it up. Many claim to be doing it out of 'choice'.
The veil of the Muslim woman is no different.
So, when the 23-year-old daughter of singer and composer AR Rahman, Khatija, shared the stage with him all covered up, the sight had 'patriarchy' stamped all over it.
The fact that women in the 21st century have to hide behind a veil — it doesn’t matter which book they draw their inspiration from — is a huge setback to the feminist movement.
Countless women world over have fought, suffered physical violence and verbal abuse in the struggle for their right to not be forced to hide themselves behind a veil. For young women to now say that the veil is a matter of 'choice' for them amounts to attacking feminism itself.
All religions have used texts to perpetuate patriarchy. They have openly made attempts to control women’s choices, sexuality and right over their own bodies, saying in no uncertain terms that man is the master of woman — but religion, interestingly, can also be a fluid concept whose tenets can adjust to changing times. And they must because they were written thousands of years ago. For some to lay claim to total antiquity, and go back to the veil in the name of religion, is an utterly regressive choice.
We owe it to the many women who fought for our freedom — and the many who continue to do so each day — that we discard every single symbol of misogyny and patriarchy. The veil, including one lovingly beamed at by a proud father like AR Rahman, is simply such a symbol, unequally applied only on women, never even considered as a mark of modesty or purity for men.
Why not? We wonder.
Now, once again to the question of 'choice'.
Choice was one of the initial motivations of feminism but it has feminism in a bind now. Feminism needs to lay out basic principles, like a black book or a constitution, that puts women above all else — above religions, above nations, above other pressure groups, because that's what feminism was supposed to be.
About nothing else but women. And their genuine choice.