Why Sonia Gandhi decided to stay back in India over Italy

New Delhi was not the India she had imagined, at least the part where she lived, with its wide avenues lined with tall, evergreen trees, many of them in bloom. The Bachchans lived in Willingdon Crescent, an avenue lined with beautiful old trees.

The British town planners, Lutyens and Baker, who made New Delhi into a pleasant garden city wanted each avenue to have its own species of tree. Janpath, formerly Queen's Way, had neem; Akbar Road had tamarinds, and on Safdarjung Road, where Indira Gandhi's residence was, there was a profusion of flame trees with their shiny green foliage dotted with flowers. The road traffic comprised cyclists, carts pulled by donkeys or camels, wagons with yellow tops, backfiring motorcycles, old Ambassadors, all of them dodging the cows that wandered freely around the middle of the road. It was not unusual to come across an oxcart, or an elephant carrying goods, waiting at the traffic lights. It was a city of a few million inhabitants, without large department stores and with a single luxury hotel in the heart of the diplomatic quarter.

Sonia Gandhi was welcomed with all the warmth that could be expected from an Indian family. Rajiv Gandhi could not be with her as much as he would have liked because on January 25, he was going to take the commercial pilot's exam and had to continue accumulating flying hours and studying. But his cousins and friends, and even Indira Gandhi, did their utmost for her stay to be pleasant. Although she was staying at the Bachchans' house, she spent a large part of the day at Rajiv's home. At that time, the prime minister lived with hardly any security measures. She received people every morning at the doors of her home with Sonia and Rajiv Gandhi surrounded by Indira Gandhi and the Mainos (Sonia's immediate family) on their wedding day. just one guard present. Neither did her sons have escorts, except for certain events that were considered to be risky…

New and Strange

For Sonia, everything around her was new and strange: the colours, the tastes, the people. "But strangest of all were the eyes of the people, that look of curiosity that followed me everywhere." Sonia was becoming initiated into the world of India, discovering how curious and inquisitive the inhabitants could be, especially in those days when there were few tourists. A foreign woman who dressed in Western wear attracted a lot of attention or criticism. Sonia had to learn to control her gestures, her movements and her way of dressing, but it was not always easy: "The absolute lack of privacy, the need to control myself and not show my feelings was an exasperating experience."

Signs of affection in public were frowned upon, not only in the streets, but also in daily life. She could not kiss Rajiv if there was anyone else present, or even hold his hand. She was discovering that India had inherited these Victorian codes from the British. Then there were things that were difficult for an Italian girl: the food, for example. Sonia could not get used to the hot spices and felt that they diminished the flavour of the food... Or the custom of society dinners, where people talked and drank a lot for an interminable time, quickly had dinner, and left leaving no time for post-dinner conversation.

She did not take long to realise that the eyes that gazed at her so insistently were not doing so just because she was a foreigner, or because she was attractive. She was seen as a new member of the family who had lived in the public eye for years. Everything they did or didn't say was scrutinised, analysed, and judged. How can you live like that? she asked herself, overwhelmed. But, in spite of everything, Sonia could not see herself back in Italy. This was a very different world, and there was a lot more to see and to explore.

With Rajiv by her side, it was a fascinating journey, in spite of the hidden dangers. Furthermore, she was surrounded by affection. Sanjay treated her like a sister, half-protective and half-amused at seeing her adapting to India. Amitabh and his family looked after her well. She felt protected and loved. For both Rajiv and Sonia, the idea of separating again was simply inconceivable. Why waste more time, why go back to Italy and wait again? Rajiv could not contemplate going to live in Europe; he was thinking of joining Indian Airlines as soon as he got his commercial licence. Life together was within their reach here in Delhi.

Sonia had come to get to know India and its customs, but her decision was already made before she boarded that flight in Milan - she was going to follow her heart. She could not imagine her father's face when she told him she was not returning to Italy and that she was getting married.

 Reprinted with the publisher's permission.