Start talking, and listening, about loneliness

Early this year, the UK appointed a minister for loneliness. British Prime Minister Theresa May said this was to address the loneliness endured by the elderly, and those who have no one to talk to.

The shocking recent suicides of celebrity designer Kate Spade and celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain proved that mental health follows no known pattern.

It’s not merely an issue with only those who have no one to talk to. Also, it’s irrespective of age, gender, profession, success, social, marital, economic status, etc. – boundaries we are building every moment to stereotype depression.

Bollywood actor Anupam Kher recently put up a video on Twitter, asking people to open up. Sharing his personal encounter with depression, he urged his followers to reach out, to stop faking a smile, to stop trying to always 'fit in'. A few years ago, when Deepika Padukone talked about her phase of depression on television, mental health was finally brought on the table for discussion in India.

Friends! This video is an attempt by me to spread awareness about the most silent and perhaps the biggest disease spreading at an alarming speed in the world today - DEPRESSION. Please make it reach out to people and help. Thanks. #LoveLifeLiveLife ????????https://t.co/VU5GW98nSK

— Anupam Kher (@AnupamPKher) June 18, 2018

But then, the discussion went all over the places, from whether depression is a “luxury” only some can afford, to whether the millennials are too fragile to differentiate between depression and temporary sadness.

While the mainstream discourse about depression advised all of us to not stifle ourselves in loneliness, another parallel narrative warned us to stay away from “toxic people”, a very new-age phrase to define people who spread negativity. There are apparently “healing” discussions on how to spot toxic people and how to stay away from them, which leads us to the obvious conundrum — whom do we honestly reach out to?

No doubt more people are talking about depression today. But are their words actually making any difference in the gaping hole many consider their lives have become?

The World Health Organisation (WHO) has ranked depression as the single largest contributor to global disability. On Indian statistics, more than 56 million Indians – 4.5 per cent of India’s population — suffer from depression, followed by China, where 4.2 per cent of its population suffers from this disorder.

All these, including many more such reports dissecting depression, emphasise the fact that it is not easy to open up. It was never easy for those who finally, and tragically, gave in.

To open up, one has to first acknowledge the fact that there is a need to open up.

Also, who is even listening in an age when "Good morning" messages on WhatsApp irk us so much?

Having moved to other cities for our studies or career, many of us have surrounded ourselves with a number of impersonal relationships. The fear of being judged or bullied forces us to shun the tangible world often, and embrace the digital world seeking virtual validation.

Will India's existing professional help be adequate enough to handle this situation - simply the tip of the iceberg as younger Indians get lonelier and talk — and listen — so much less?