It's not real life: Why an Instagram celeb gave up social media
The emotional outburst of teen Instagram sensation Essena O'Neill on YouTube last week has created a major stir across the internet. As the 19-year-old cried over the emptiness that her monumental fame has brought upon her, many were left confused. Wasn't she living the ultimate dream with half-a-million strong followers on Instagram, 60,000 plus views on Snapchat and 2,50,000 subscribers on YouTube?
Instead of declaring that "Social media is not real", shouldn't the Australian e-sensation be revelling in the glory of winning the "popularity contest"?
Apparently not. In one of her videos that she posted on her new website Letsbegamechangers.com, the young model deplores, "I don't even know who I am, I don't know what I stand for… I let numbers define me at 12 and that stopped me (from) becoming the person that I am and I should be... There are so many things I could have done with my time; that I could have just enjoyed."
She breaks down further and observes, "Here at nearly 19, with all these followers, I don't even know what is real... You don't have to prove your life on Instagram for it to be a good life... You don't have to be a f*cking model to know that you are beautiful."
The blogger has deleted over 2,000 of her pictures, and edited the captions of the remaining to those like, "I didn't pay for the dress, took countless photos trying to look hot for Instagram, the formal made me feel incredibly alone." She has even admitted to being paid to promote products and that she hardly ate all day to look perfect in the photographs. In her war against social media, she urges her fans to discuss real issues like "reality behind paid posts, animal cruelty, environmental damage, gender equality."
Meanwhile, celebrity supermodel Karlie Kloss has revealed in an interview in the December issue of British Vogue magazine that she's interested in pursuing goals that are stimulating and satisfying to her. As she shares, "About two years ago I started to think about what happens to me next. I'm a 23-year-old model and I want to think less about my looks and more about my future, and that involves my brain." She has started studying computer coding, and discloses, "Call me a nerd, but I love coding... I think it's sexy to learn this stuff; it enables and it empowers both sexes."
Has relying on one's looks to gain fame earned a bad name? Young celebrities and scientific research seem to agree.
Studies suggest that deriving happiness from external validation for traits such as good looks, wealth or status is counterproductive, and more often than not, leads to low self-esteem. Sidetracking goals that are personally worthwhile in favour of social acceptance, and trading meaningful relationships for en masse "followers" can contribute to feelings of emptiness, loneliness and dissatisfaction.
In his research on the "The Psychology of Popularity", Dr Mitch Prinstein, distinguished professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, suggests that the body physically reacts in such situations. In an interview with Positivepsychologyprogram.com, he states, "Our brains are actually developed to care more about social connection than so many other aspects of what we engage in. In fact, there's recent research that when we're at risk of being isolated, it activates pain centres in our brain, telling us that one of the worst thing we can do for our survival is lose out on social connections."
In another research published by psychological scientists Joseph P Allen, Bert N Uchino, and Christopher A Hafen in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, it was found that not having close friendships in adolescence leads to higher stress, anxiety and depression later on in life.
The Australian blogger's melt-down where she repeatedly talks about her online presence and popularity not being "real", and editing captions so as not to "profit off deluding people" comes as a basic human need to connect with others and lead a life authentic to her own ideals.
Sure, it's great to be successful and famous, and to live the good life. But there's nothing beautiful about feeling lonely or missing out on life to look "perfect" for others. There's nothing cool about being a vapid role model, with childhood dreams and conversation fading with every blinding flashbulb.
The insecurity and pressure of perfection are creeping up on virtual existence, and no matter how "natural" a contrived picture looks, it can't substitute for real-life experiences that create genuine happiness.