Are you being Love Bombed? It is now considered a form of abuse in the UK
Love Bombing can be very attractive and addictive; since in the beginning, you get a rush of dopamine and endorphin, while you are receiving lavish gifts and big promises. Illustration: Getty Images
It's 2023 and dating is more complicated than ever. From casuals to situationships, to finding out if you're being manipulated, it is not easy. But don't worry, we got you. If you are also feeling overwhelmed in a relationship, there are chances you might be falling into a trap called, 'Love Bombing'.
Love Bombing? What is it?
Let's understand it in simple terms first. So imagine you just met someone and they're super into you. They shower you with compliments, gifts, and attention like crazy. It's all very intense and can feel like a fairytale. That's Love Bombing.
But here's the catch: The whole thing might be a manipulation tactic. The person doing the Love Bombing might not actually care about you as a person, they just want to win you over and control you.
Now, let's understand it from a psychological POV: Love Bombing is characterized by excessive attention, admiration, and affection with the goal to make the recipient feel dependent and obligated to that person, and then later the partner does nothing, once they get the hold of you.
Love Bombing can be very attractive and addictive; since in the beginning, you get a rush of dopamine and endorphin, while you are receiving lavish gifts and big promises.
How to spot a Love-Bomber?
Psychologist Alaina Tiani, PhD, told healthclevelandclinic that love bombing looks different on different people. But, in general, there are some common traits:
- Excessive flattery and praise.
- Over-communication of their feelings for you.
- Showering you with unneeded/unwanted gifts.
- Early and intense talks about your future together.
- Intense jealousy
- Not respecting your boundaries
- You don't get time for other relationships
However, she adds that it is not the ultimate goal.
Love Bombing is now officially a kind of abuse
Love Bombing is certainly a kind of manipulation, and according to experts, it is done by narcissistic or anxious or insecure attachment-style person.
Recently, The Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) in the United Kingdom has revised its guidance on the various ways that abusive partners can manipulate and control their victims and included Love Bombing as a new addition to the list. The CPS has advised prosecutors to take into account whether such behaviours form part of the overall pattern of conduct when considering cases of abuse.
How to get out of such relationships?
According to experts, one can be in a toxic relationship, where your partner is Love Bombing you, sometimes intentionally and sometimes even unintentionally.
For such cases, there are ways by which you can have a better relationship:
- If your partner is Love-Bombing you unintentionally try asking them to set up better boundaries -- like ask them to give you space and respect your 'me time'.
- Try seeking outside help - counselling and couple's therapy always works
- However, if you are getting the 'vibe' that your partner is doing this knowingly and has only the intention of manipulating you, getting out of that relationship might be the best option for you.