'First Period' director tells us why mothers still don't talk to daughters about menstrual hygiene
There is a girl that appears in the last scene of my new film. In that scene she has to enact getting her periods for the first time. I had auditioned many 13-15 year old girls for the part, and the scene that I made them audition was the one above. Most of the girls performed the scene with a naturalness that left me spoilt for choice.
These were teenage girls, all of them accompanied by their mothers to the auditions. They must have had their periods so they knew how to act the scene out perfectly, with élan and pathos. I spent a few anxious days debating which girl to finalise for the part, because all of them were such consummate performers.
Eventually, I chose the girl that is now in the film. I selected her because she had the most expressive eyes and since the girl’s character has no dialogue, I was solely focusing on the eyes and how intensely they could emote and pierce. I wanted her eyes to express a sense of terror on seeing blood coming out of her private parts for the first time. The girl in the film conveyed this most evocatively. She shook me up.
We shot this scene in a tiny, cramped toilet. There were four of us in the toilet and it was hot, stuffy and suffocating with the shooting lights beating down on us like electric suns. The enormous camera equipment made it tough for us to move about. I remember I was sitting under a leaking sink. Besides the girl, the rest of us were men.
The situation felt odd, so I asked the girl’s mother to join us in the already cramped loo. She was slim so she fit under the shower stall. I delicately discussed the scene with the girl, aware of the fact that this was a sensitive topic, especially for a teenage girl like herself. I tried not to sound squeamish as I gave her directions. As I explained the scene, the girl remained silent, never asking me a question, never wanting any further clarity. For the auditions, all the girls had come prepared. The casting director had pre-empted the girls and their mothers about the scene I would be auditioning them for, so when I auditioned them, they were keenly aware of the situation. I assumed the girl knew exactly what to do now.
I was so wrong.
As the cinematographer told me he was ready, I said action. We waited in the still heat for the girl to act out the scene, but she froze. The water from the underside of the sink dripped away on my nose and it felt like an ant crawling.
I said cut and we rolled again, and again I said action. Once again the girl froze. With the arc lights shining on her face, she looked petrified, and wounded, like a deer in headlights, but most of all she seemed bewildered. I asked her what the problem was. She looked at her mother, her eyes filled with a quizzical chaos. Then we all looked at the mother who had turned ashen. Moments of confusion passed in the stifling silence and heat, the leaking sink punctuating each second with a drop that sounded like gentle thunder.
Then the mother requested me to step outside. I wrestled myself out from under the sink and stepped out of the toilet into the room outside. I felt I had emerged alive from a crypt. The mother followed after me. She was unable to speak for the first few seconds. Then with a quivering chin she made a confession. She told me that her daughter had no idea what periods were and that she had never discussed the topic with her. Her daughter had not had her periods yet.
I was aghast. I lambasted the mother for allowing her daughter to audition and shoot for this film. The mother almost broke down and then in her trembling voice told me she had lied to her before the audition. The mother had told the daughter that she had to act as though there was blood oozing out of her thigh. Since there was no dialogue, she hoodwinked us all.
I castigated the mother for not telling her daughter the truth and for putting her and me and the rest of the crew in this strange, bizarre and terribly uncomfortable situation. I told the mother that it was not my responsibility to explain menstrual hygiene to her daughter. That responsibility was hers and hers alone. By now I was furious with the mother. I also told her that a film shoot was no place to explain such an important milestone in her daughter’s life to her.
The mother had tears in her eyes. She said that she did not know how to explain menstruation to her daughter without feeling shameful and embarrassed and that she did not have the courage to tell her what it is even now, but she did promise me that she would gather the strength to tell her soon. I didn’t believe her. Maybe because I was so appalled by her. Finally we shot the scene with the girl acting as though her thigh was bleeding.
This is the reason I wanted to make this film, and this is the reason why my writer Ishani Banerjee and I chose to tell the story we did. I’m so proud of the script Ishani has written. Being a woman, she has understood all of the nuances.
I hope you enjoy the film and I hope it stirs you to tell your daughters that periods are a normal bodily function for girls. Just like urinating is.
Let’s rise to the occasion. The time is now.
Let it flow.