What if women heckled, ogled and sent out rape threats on Women’s Day?

It’s that time of the year again. March 8, or the day we nominate as the International Women’s Day, is those 24 hours when even the most sexist, crude, misogynist troll would tweet in the honour of women. It’s a big sham and helps the companies sell more beauty products. So, what if we observed Women’s Day by inverting the order?

Suggestion A

What if women ogled at men on Women’s Day?

Being stared at for just being there is what women face everyday. Whether it’s on the metro to college or work, in office, on the streets, in shops and malls, in the clinics, in movie halls – is there a place where women can roam about freely?

So, what if on Women’s Day the women loitered with gay abandon and ogled lustily at men? What if on the Metro there was just the gent’s compartment, and the rest were teeming with women eyeing the couple of men and visually raping them with the stares? What if the female gaze made men uncomfortable and recoil in horror? What if on Women’s Day, the women taught the men about the male gaze?

Suggestion B

What if women heckled and Adam-teased on Women’s Day?

The comments section directed at women in public places is something that’s special indeed. Fat-shaming, sex-shaming, height-shaming, cropped hair-shaming, skin colour-shaming, boob-shaming, and what not, often in choicest Hinglish as a throwback to cosmopolitan sexism.

What if women made dog-whistles at men every time they passed by? What if men were made to feel miserable about the very prospect of going out, traveling to work, taking a vacation, fetching milk and bread, driving around, and hundreds of routine things that women half-dread because well, the omnipresence of eve-teasing?

Suggestion C

What if women trolled men with rape threats on Women’s Day?

An entire book has been penned by a female journalist on the issue of trolling. Swati Chaturvedi’s I Am A Troll isn’t only about politicised virtual abuse, it’s equally about how it is a gendered tool, laced with rape threats when it comes to targeting women with an opinion.

So, what if women sent out the rape threats today? What if every man with an opinion different from a woman gets abused with sexually charged opprobrium? What if rape is used as a tool to silence the man trying to silence dissent? What if every women sent out a rape threat to the members of ABVP who trolled Gurmehar Kaur, Barkha Dutt, Swati Chaturvedi, Sonam Kapoor, Shruti Seth, Shehla Rashid and others with the vilest and sexually fraught abuse?

Suggestion D

What if women told men what was okay to wear on Women’s Day?

No well-fitting jeans. Ties are henceforth outlawed. Three-piece suits not after 6pm. No lungis. No shorts. No shirts with buttons open. No shirts with stripes. No T-shirts. No navy blue. No sky blue. No blazers in winter. No kurtas in summer. No swimming trunks: swim full-clothed. No boxer shorts. No gym wear. No leather shoes. No hair gel. No cologne (okay taking this back, men need this more than any other thing).

No moustaches. No middle parting. No side-parting. No bald heads. No pony tails. No paunches. No hyper-muscularity. No bony frames. No flaunting the gym toned bodies. Never bare-chested. Always bare-chested. Never wearing glasses. Never wearing anything without a written consent from a female guardian. Never wearing jeans to libraries. To parties. To offices.  

Suggestion E

What if women asked men to keep a fast on Women’s Day and pray for our long lives?

You would readily do it, right?

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