Elon Musk wants you to pay Rs 650 a month for Twitter blue tick, but what does it come with?

Did you always dream of having a blue verified check next to your name on Twitter? Did you too want to join the elite club of all those "verified" important seeming people? Did your verification request also get rejected by Twitter several times over and you are mad? 

Fret not, the new Twitter boss understands your pain of not being able to impersonate someone on Twitter and be verified. All you have to do is buy that "coveted" blue tick mark.

Cost: $8 or Rs 661 per month (*The price may vary from country to country)

This is a better price than what that Nigerian Prince on email was asking you for in return for a verified account, which was $20 (Rs 1,600) a month.

It's a bargain. 

Plus, there are other benefits. Check this out: 

And, you will be able to make money as an influencer too (dream job!). If you aren't able to make money, then your content probably sucks! 

Oh, and if your narcissistic ego thinks you are a special someone, you will get a tag of 'Public Figure' below your name. This will be subject to you proving to Twitter, that you are actually a public figure. So yes, there will still be those pesky elitists out there. Huff!

When can you get it? We don't know. We checked and the annoying verification process still exists. 

If you are too eager, you can post your questions to Twitter Complaint Hotline Operator (Elon Musk) on @elonmusk Twitter handle. Also, you may want to bookmark this account already because soon enough there may be similar-looking, blue-checked @elonmusk handles out there. 

Oh, did someone say they have a blue check already? Then your pretentious a** will also need to pay to keep it! Otherwise, nobody will know you on Twitter. It is likely that you get buried.

The same goes for you too, Stephen King! And just because you wrote a few best-selling books doesn't mean Twitter will pay YOU to make content on its platform.  Who even reads books nowadays?

What about Twitter Blue subscription? For boomers who don't know what's Twitter Blue subscription, why are you on the Internet at all?

• Anyway, it's a Twitter subscription for which you pay around $4 to get added benefits, like ad-free experience. But there are some changes here too. 
• Twitter Blue subscribers won't have an ad-free experience in the Elon realm. 
• Other perks like undo, edit tweets (in some places) will exist. 
• You will still be able to customise the navigation bar for your two left hands. 
• If you want to show off your NFTs, you can still set it as your profile picture, which will be verified as a real NFT, not a screenshot!

In a nutshell, don't use your brain too much and just keep paying, set the subscription on auto-payment and forget about it. 

Musk paid and overpaid about $44 billion (your poor self can't even fathom the number of zeroes and conversion amount), so you can do your little bit by paying pennies to the billionaire at least. 

Why the changes, you ask? Well, because like Twitter's boss Elon Musk said BUSINESSES NEED TO MAKE MONEY! You can't expect to get freebies all your life!

• Moreover, it will solve the problem of bots and spam accounts. Just don't ask how.

And also because Musk cannot rely on advertisers anymore; they are being a little b**** apparently.

• General Motors, a rival of another great Musk-owned company Tesla, has already stopped advertising on Twitter. 
• A few major brands have also reportedly quietly halted their advertising on Twitter for the time being. Basically, all these businesses are waiting to see how Musk shapes Twitter. 

BTW, who do you want to impersonate on Twitter with a blue check?