'I was stunned to read the driver threatened her with an iron rod': Delhi gang rape victim's mother

The rape of a young woman in a cab, earlier this month, is a stark reminder that nothing has changed in our society since that fateful December 16 night when we lost our daughter to six demons on the streets of Delhi. It has been long two years. Of course, several things have changed; stringent laws to tackle rape have been passed; registering a case has become much easier and there is now more support for survivors and victims' families. But yet, certain things remain the same. There is hardly any fear of law among perpetrators. I was stunned when I read that the Uber cab driver had threatened to use an iron rod if the girl resisted his attempt to rape. Our entire family could not eat for three days.

Did we fight for last two years to hear this? Did the thousands of young boys and girls take to the streets to achieve this? Will my daughter be the benchmark of how to torture a rape victim? I hoped she would be remembered as the country’s daughter who gave her life to instil respect for women in the minds of the sons, brothers, fathers and husbands of this country. What’s the use of new law if it fails to deter crimes? The criminals seem to have been only emboldened.

I believe this has happened because my daughter still has not got justice. The culprits are still alive. Our wait for justice has become endless. The case is now in Supreme Court and, for last six months, there has not been a single hearing. When people from across the country joined us in our grief and anger, I was certain some dramatic changes would happen only to be mistaken two years later. Even though changes have happened, most of these changes are in paper only. There is hardly any difference in real sense.

The legal process in the country must change. Take the example of the case of my daughter. There was enough evidence against the criminals; the police did a great job. The media supported us. The case was fast tracked. The conviction was done. Yet the punishment has not been executed yet. Quick justice instils fear; but our judicial system is known for long delays. And other cases are not even fast tracked. So the process goes on without even conviction. Rape is not like any other crime. It destroys an entire family. When such cases are reported in media, many people come forward to show support though for most of them it’s just a formality to be observed. Everyone vanishes after ten days. The actual sufferings begin much later with the survivor or victim’s family often facing social ostracisation. And look at how our society treats rapists who are out on bail. The survivor finds it difficult to get married, while the perpetrators roam around freely. The stigma should stick to the rapists, not to the woman who is violated. I even read news reports about politicians and social leaders even trying to justify rape. If such mindsets continue, I don’t think my daughter will get justice in the true sense of the term.

I have great faith in our Prime Minister Narendra Modiji. He is a capable administrator and has a vision for the country. I want to meet him once and appeal to him that along with Swacch Bharat campaign he must launch a clean-up drive against crimes, especially crimes against women. I want him to create an “aparadh mukt bharat” (crime free India).

But he can’t do it alone. We have to fulfil our own responsibilities. We must teach young boys in school why it’s important to respect girls. We must raise our sons making them understand that women are not the inferior sex. Policing and laws alone can’t prevent crimes. Rape happens inside the four walls of home. The rot is in the society. We must stop discriminating between boys and girls. I always tell my two sons that every woman in this world is someone’s daughter, sister, wife or mother. They must do everything possible so that no girl has to go through what their sister had to face. This will be their best tribute to my brave daughter who always stood up for the right cause. If we really want to see that no girl in our country is raped, we must restore our family values. The Uber cab driver was a married man with children. I kept wondering if he remembered even for once his family when he committed that heinous crime. But we can’t sit idle. Bringing social reforms is not easy, but we must start. It has not been an easy fight for us for last two years and my daughter is gone forever. But I will continue my fight against the system, against the social mindset.

I’m thankful to media, police, and judiciary for their support. We would not have been able to come this far without their support. I’m immensely grateful to all those who stood by us over the last two years. I appeal to those youngsters, who came out spontaneously, to not let this movement die down. Your struggle is not over yet as those predators are still out there. I read in newspaper that the Uber cab survivor was one among the protestors. Did she brave water cannons to face this one day? We, as a society must question ourselves—why do we treat our daughters like this? We call them Durga and then use them like disposable paper plates. This has to change. Otherwise this yearly outrage around this time of the year is meaningless.

(As told to Kaushik Deka)