How porn ban is an important step in India's rise

India's liberals have their pink knickers in a knot after the decisive new regime banned online porn by an executive order, circumnavigating a Supreme Court refusal to ban porn websites. If the geeks can find a way around a block, the government can do it too. This is a tech-savvy government, you can be proud of. As the Prime Minister said, the snake-charmers of the yore are mouse-charmers and more.  

Pinko liberals keep pestering the government to take bold decisions, but when the government does take one, they scream murder. That's the age-old Gujarat technique: Poke the Gir lion in the eye, and when the lion roars, play victim and vilify the king of the jungle. Pornography is disgusting, they agree. Liberals say porn demeans women, objectifies them and is misogynist to the core. But they do not want a ban. You can't have your creampie and eat it too. What kind of an argument is that in the first place? Is porn an essential commodity like cigarette or alcohol that cannot be banned even if harmful? 

Actually, the ban reminds them of their beloved beef, which they didn't eat much but want to retain the right to eat. Their beef with the word ban is that a ban curtails their fundamental rights? Right to do what? Right to eat beef, right to watch porn, while eating beef? Proof that meat-eating makes people not only randy, but also crazy and liberal. That's a threesome. When BJP leaders said Chinese noodles cause rape, there was an outrage. They said there was no scientific proof. They are always siding with the Chinese. The new government came to power and we discovered that noodles are harmful, and now have been banned. Once Chinese sauce is gone, we will have no eve-teasing. The problem of rape is already tackled. 

Two birds, both stoned

The free access to pornographic websites leads to violence against women. People are not born rapists. Except in the case of Asaram Bapu who indulged in excessive preaching before reaching for an underage disciple, people become rapists after watching sex scenes online. Look at the boom in gay population. Normal people watch gay porn and become gay and then indulge in gay sex, which leads to gay pregnancy and more gay children being born as a result. Like father, like son. With this ban, the government has tackled two birds with one stone: The heterosexual bird and the homosexual bird and prevented birds of that feather from frolicking together. 

We should be proud that the government is following norms laid by the Constitution. Yes, a couple of non-porn websites were also banned, including that of a French newspaper that sounded quite like a Hindi cuss word. Anyway, the French kiss is obscene. No kissing is Indian culture. It prevents exchange of oral bacteria. Some people are claiming that the ban was imposed under Section 69 of the IT Act. Nothing can be farther from the truth. The access to 857 URLs was blocked under the provision of Section 79(3)(b) of the Information Technology Act, 2000 as the content hosted on these websites relate to morality and decency as given in Article 19(2) of the Constitution of India. 

Moral high

There is no 69 here. However you do notice the words, morality and decency? Thank you for being alert, moral and decent. Our Constitution does not define morality and decency, hence it is left to the protectors of Indian culture to declare things immoral and indecent before asking the government to ban them. This is how the statute book empowers the government chosen by the people to limit their freedom, because people are clueless. Everybody needs a shepherd. Christians had Jesus, and God says in the Bible that masturbation is bad and He is keeping a watch. Islam too prohibits such things. The land of the pure Islam, Pakistan, has banned YouTube.  

Are we any less than Pakistan? We agree that we do not have the minerals that Taliban displayed in Bamiyan. The Taliban found the Buddha statue carved into the mountainside obscene, as Islam forbids images. They blew them. We have not done that with pornographic statuettes indulging in bestiality and homosexuality. Because we don't know how to do it. These ancient liberals carved them into temple walls of all the places. We cannot demolish temples erected centuries ago. Can we? We have to live with the offline porn sites, but online can surely be banned. 

Development agenda

The decision to ban online smut should expand every Indian chest to 56-inch-virat-level, also known as the heart-samrat level. Some of the commie commentariat want to criticise Prime Minister Modi for focusing on the trivial after winning the election on the development agenda. Can they answer this simple question: How will the country develop if its citizens are busy watching porn after eating beef noodles? The ban will improve productivity in private and public offices, and even legislatures. For example, those Karnataka BJP MLAs will rise and raise the issue of farmer suicides, since they will have nothing else to do.  

The nation can do with some hands. The common man has to realise that electing a government is not enough, you have to keep supporting the government. It's no longer Congress ka haath, aam aadmi ke saath. This government's slogan has been Sabka haath, sabka vikaas. Let us build a nation that is pure and free of distractions like deliberately naked people. Free yourself of these dark desires. Avoid eating onion and garlic if you find it difficult.