What being a Haryanvi has taught me

For much of the world, residents of Haryana have become lathi-wielding caricatures, but if our early exposure to culture shapes our worldview in some way, here are five things Haryana taught me:

1. Love for nature and animals: Haryanvis, raised mostly in an agrarian culture, live off the land and are at the mercy of nature, whose whims they rely on for their crop and livelihood.

"When will the unseasonal rains stop?" or "is the summer going to be unforgiving and long?" are questions that have more weight than what one would expect in urban weather chit chat. Food, too, is seasonal: you pluck sugar cane off from the fields and eat it sitting in the verandah, till your mouth is sore from the cane's roughness. Sarson saag is to be had in winter, also fresh from the fields - with roti from the tandoor in the courtyard.

If you're taking an evening walk and feel thirsty, you stop at the farm belonging to a neighbour (in the village, everyone knows one another), introduce yourself by announcing your grandfather's name, and get juicy kinoos off the tree to quench your thirst.

Everyone has some or all farm animals or birds - cows, buffalos, chickens or sheep - to milch, to till the land, for eggs or wool - all that can be sold. When you grow up surrounded by farm animals, you are excited about every newborn calf, sheep and chick. My maternal grandfather, an IPS officer who chose early retirement to return to looking after the lands, took great pride in his buffalos. They were taken to the village point daily for a frolic and a bath - and regularly sent for buffalo contests.

Urban folk laugh at such an exhibit, calling it the Cattle Fashion Show by the unsophisticated, but it is a community of animal welfare long before PETA made it a fashionable term.

Such exposure to farm animals, along with an unstated affection for them as partners in the man-animal agrarian collaboration, perhaps, helps shape attitudes about the animal kingdom. Like others in my family, which considers itself progressive and modern, I too was raised a non-vegetarian - as a rejection of tradition and a move towards urbanity. However, I was to turn vegetarian at age 12 or so, when I began thinking more deeply about where the meat was coming from. It is entirely possible that my exposure to farm living may have had something to do with it.

New research also suggests that vegetarians may have developed the gene over time, therefore inheriting it. It would certainly explain why quite a few members of my family also went back to being vegetarian after a generation of experimenting with meat eating.

I am an unapologetic animal lover and vegetarian - though it is by choice and not culture or religion enforced, as a lot of vegetarians continue to be nurtured in India. However, my love of animals may be influenced by culture, the same way dog lovers are influenced by urban pet culture and exposure to dogs, though I am only hazarding a guess. For me, a dog or sheep or a cat or a cow are the same.

2. Solitude and humdrum: Because when one is surrounded by acres and acres of fields, one begins to pay close attention to the climate and the seasons, the sunsets and the heat, and find means of entertainment like playing marbles or chasing peacocks, or imitating the parrots who interrupt the silence with their lunchtime calls. One undertakes tasks like painstakingly plucking cotton from cotton pods, sitting in comfortable silence with one's grandmother and other women, and finds a sense of accomplishment in such mundane farm activities.

One learns to respect the discipline of labour and the art of passing time on one's own, no birthday parties and multiplex outings. No mean skill to learn and apply in life, this.

3. Making a success with whatever limited resources you have: The winning spirit is a Haryanvi trait - having competed at local wrestling tournaments, they don't want to be left behind at the national and global stage. Haryana has given many sons to the military and is today giving many sons and daughters to many an international sport, particularly wrestling. There are few forms of entertainment and skill development, so Haryanvis make a name for themselves by offering their strength. This inspires no end.

4. The tireless spirit of Haryana's women, despite the unrelenting patriarchy: Agriculture is the main source of income, there are very few other job opportunities, and while land owning farmers also must live within the limits of this economy, they do not suffer as do farmers and labour without land - the resulting alcoholism and unemployment is high.

A lot of men are victims of these circumstances - but the women do not even have the luxury of being victims. Despite the unrelenting patriarchy and its symbol - the oppressive knee-length ghungat, they go about fetching water from wells, labouring on the fields and looking after their children while their men succumb to nothingness.

The women always have a smile on their faces, they love to show off and talk to each other of their colourful cheap glass and metal jewellery - toe rings and bangles - and they seem to have faith that they will emerge from their circumstances and their children will see a better future. Their life is hard, their spirit and hard work inspiring, yet heartbreaking at the same time.

5. A sense of humour: There is not much literature on Haryanvis and their way of life or language, but it is by and large acknowledged that they have a unique sense of humour - as captured by the popular Channel V character Uddam Singh. Their humour, for a simple, rustic people, is quite sophisticated - it has punch, precision and logic. They are outrageously funny, whether educated or not. It shows a certain refinement - as every comic artist will know, humour is no easy thing.

There is a Haryanvi Jat saying that acknowledges this: "Unpadh jaat padha likha barabar, padha likha Jat khuda barabar (an illiterate Jat is as good as a literate one, the literate one is as good as God)."

Despite organising themselves into groups of late, such as during the call for reservations by Jat groups, they are fiercely independent - anti-incumbency is high, and political parties have to try hard to get the Haryanvi vote.