Why Delhi doesn't feel sorry for Sri Lankan cricket players who complained about pollution

It is official. Just like the "concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make US manufacturing non-competitive" (President Trump, who else), Delhi smog is a bogey invented by those who hate Hindu festivals, do not wish Delhi to drive fast and furious, or are poor losers in cricket.

Sunday in the national capital dawned poisoned and polluted, but that is not the point. Delhiites are tough people, whom a little deadly smog cannot keep in. Problem is, not everyone has enjoyed the benefits of a Delhi upbringing.

The Sri Lankan cricket team was in town to play a Test match, and they demonstrated that they were less than a match for not just our players, but also our air.

The Islanders, with no thought of manly pride, came to the field wearing masks. Our Prime Minister Narendra Modi had recently severely criticised Indira Gandhi for covering her nose while visiting a tragedy-struck town in Gujarat. The Sri Lankans had the chance to hear and heed. But no, they did not.

They came to the field with masks on their faces, as if the match was a costume drama. Then, one of their players fell ill. Obviously, it was because Virat Kohli's performance was enough to knock the breath out of anyone, but they pretended it was due to the pollution.

After a long drama that involved play halting twice, some Sri Lankan players vomiting, both coaches walking on to the field, the match referee holding discussions with a doctor, Sri Lanka at one point playing with 10 players and support staff gearing up to play, captain Kohli had had enough and declared the innings.

Delhi is rightly outraged that King Kohli lost his wicket because he was disturbed by the Sri Lankans' antics. A few days ago, he too had spoken out against Delhi's pollution, but it is okay, that did not apply to today's match.

If Delhiites like people to know unke baap kaun hain before getting into tussles, BCCI knows it is the baap of most cricket-playing nations. It too displayed little patience with Sri Lanka's poor sportsman spirit.

"If 20,000 people in the stands did not have problem and the Indian team did not face any issue, I wonder why Sri Lankan team made a big fuss. I will need to talk to the secretary and ask him to write to the Sri Lanka cricket," news agency PTI quoted BCCI acting president CK Khanna as saying.

With BCCI leading the outrage, Twitter on Sunday gave way to a lot of rage over the Sri Lankans.

Just hot air

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is the reason why Delhi is so chill about conditions that had made China declare a national emergency. If life is tough, so are Dilliwalas.

Pollution is killing Delhi with every breath it takes, children are developing health complications, the elderly are gasping, people are developing random sore throats and burning sensation in the eyes.

But do you think this calls for residents to come together, organise protests, try to create awareness about safe behaviour, demand solutions from the government? The roar you hear is Dilliwalas laughing at you.

Sure, Mumbai got all emotional over a few trees being cut for Metro 3 and bombarded the high court and the government with petitions and protests. Despite being heckled and assaulted, volunteers insist on cleaning the Versova beach (so yucky, chhee). Chennai residents began forming human chains over encroachments in Ennore Creek, which is some backwater somewhere.

But Delhi trusts god and its own resilience, and is waiting for someone to fix farmers in Punjab and Haryana, while driving to work coughing, learning to take morning walks in grey areas, and making fun of those, who wear masks.

After all, despite experts crying foul and the air continuing foul, Delhi managed to hold its half marathon recently.

The capital has a long and proud tradition of wearing adversities. So "environment lovers" and foreign cricket players can complain of breathing poison for all they want, Delhi will keep its nose proudly in the air.

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