Breathe. Rajasthan education minister believes 'cows inhale and exhale oxygen'

This is what happens when you start taking WhatsApp forwards too seriously.

Rajasthan education minister Vasudev Devnani should be considered for a Nobel in Biology for this scientific breakthrough. The minister, according to an Indian Express report, proudly proclaimed, defying all boundaries of human knowledge about mammals, that the holy cow is the only animal that inhales as well as exhales oxygen. That’s right! Cows are plants. Photosynthesis is passé. It's Gobar-synthesis you should be looking at.

Speaking at the Hingonia Goshala during an event organised by Akshay Patra foundation on January 14, the minister said “Gai ek matra prani hai jo oxygen grahan karta hai, aur oxygen his chhodta hai (The cow is the only animal that takes in oxygen and also releases oxygen)”.

Er...the Food and Agricultural Organization of the United Nations (FAO) may want to go back on their report in light of these new findings. In findings released in 2006, they observed that livestock sector generates more greenhouse gas emissions as measured in CO2 equivalent – 18 per cent – than transport. In plain terms, that means cows have the potential to produce more greenhouse gas than cars. 

Clearly, they aren’t keeping up with times.

But this didn't stop social media from dissing the genius. True to their nature, Twitterati seized this opportunity to make fun of the educated education minister and his scientific discovery.

Levity apart, the source of this merry proclamation by the education minister may actually have been a WhatsApp forward. A brief Google search will land you on a Reddit India thread from 2015 which discusses a WhatsApp forward about the astonishing properties of cows. The contents of the message are given below:

“Cow is just an animal like a hen or goat... then why should one not kill and eat it?”

Cow is also an animal, but... a cow has many specialities that no other animal (not even human beings) has in this world. This is the reason that Hindus consider cow as ‘mother’ after their own mother, and pray to the cow with respect calling it “go-matha”.

These are some truths about go-matha.

-  If a cow eats something poisonous by mistake, and we drink its milk, will we fall ill? To find out, one cow was regularly fed a particular quantity of a poison every day. After 24 hours, its blood, urine, dung and milk were tested in a lab to check where the poison could be found. In this way, the tests were done not for 1 or 2 days, but continuously for 90 days in All India Institute of Medical Sciences (AIIMS) New Delhi. The researcher did not find any trace of poison in milk, blood, urine or dung of that cow.

Then where did this poison fed for 90 days go? Just like Lord Shiva held poison in his throat, the go-matha hid the entire poison in her throat. This is a special quality that no other animal has.

-  This is the only creature that inhales oxygen and also exhales oxygen.

-  Cow milk has the quality of countering poison.

-  There are diseases that medical science has not yet understood; urine of Go-matha has the power to cure them.

-  If cow-ghee and rice are cooked together, two powerful gases called ethylene-oxide, propylene-oxide are released. Propylene-oxide is the best gas used for creating artificial rain.

-  Cow urine is the world’s best killer of microbes.

-  With medicines made using cow dung and cow urine, stomach-related ailments can be cured.

-  We can save ourselves from radio-waves by plastering the home floors and area outside home with cow-dung

- Cow-dung has the power to destroy the microbes causing cholera

-  If 10 grams of cow-ghee is put in fire (yagnya), 1 ton of oxygen is generated

-  Cow-urine is as sacred as ganga-jal

“Cow protection is the way that our species, our dharma will be protected. Cow-protection is no less than the need for independence.” - Mahatma Gandhi

Cow’s milk is tonic, its ghee is ambrosia and its meat is disease (Hazarat Mohamed)

Killing a cow is equivalent to killing a human (Jesus Christ)

Cow is a great boon to human society. Where a cow is looked after well, and protected, that country’s land will be great. Homes will prosper. Culture will progress. (Bernard Mike Faden)

The Quran does not encourage cow-slaughter (Hakeel Hajmal Khan)

Cow-slaughter is against the rules of Islam (Tauhin-e-Hind Bijaharu)

Can we see unity in diversity anywhere in the world other than in India? Whether we are a Hindu or a Muslim, or a Christian, as long as we live in our country, we are an Indian. Respecting the culture and tradition of our country is our dharma.

Freedom does not mean “live as we please”. It means living in a way that our country would like.

As the great scientist Jesse Pinkman once said:

Also read - Someone horsed around by changing 'Hollywood' to 'Hollyweed'