Manikarnika: When Jhansi ki Rani met Matrix ka Neo
For the first 20-odd seconds of the 2-minute Manikarnika teaser, you will be left wondering if you've clicked on the wrong link and landed on the Thugs Of Hindostan trailer instead. And Amitabh Bachchan's baritone in the background doesn't help either. But fret not. Kangana Ranaut's razor-sharp sword and piercing gaze soon slices her way through the Union Jack.
At the risk of getting trolled, Manikarnika, at best, looks like a mishmash of no less than three magnum opi you've watched in the past — Baahubali (alright, so it is from the same makers, but how is that any consolation?), Bajirao Mastani and Padmaavat. But it doesn't take you too long to go 'tch tch' once you spot Kangana arch backwards to dodge the swing of her enemy's sword in a Matrix-esque move.
Really, now?
The 1999 Keanu Reeves-starrer Hollywood blockbuster has been a steady source of inspiration for Bollywood fight scenes. And the gods of cinema know how many (atrocious) versions of the same we've witnessed through the years. Case in point: the Armaan Kohli-starrer Jaani Dushman: Ek Anokhi Kahani. But can we please sign a Change.org petition requesting Bollywood to update their directory? It's been two painful decades!
At the onset, it is safe to say that Kangana's Jhansi ki Rani is nothing like Varsha Usgaonkar's. Kangana uses her sword like a butter knife chopping off heads, but that string of white pearls around her neck is always on point — even when she's smeared in blood. Her gladiator sandals and leather armour seem to have been imported from ancient Greece, and she seems to never have a bad hair day. The only way Radha Krishna Jagarlamudi (director, Manikarnika) can justify all this is if Jhansi Ki Rani and Matrix ka Neo (Thomas Anderson, played by Reeves) sat down for a one-on-one in an alternate universe. It is as if the two discussed each move and mutually arrived on a consensus.
Neo: "You need the black trench coat for the dramatic trail. And the glasses. Oh, you have to have the glasses!
"Rani: "Hmm... that might be problematic. How about I go with a white anarkali instead? That will take care of the dramatic trail. And let's replace the glasses with a string of pearls?" #authenticity
After all, anything can happen in the matrix.
Of the many questions the teaser fails to shine a light on, the most noteworthy one is who finally got to replace Sonu Sood. I have my money on Reeves. What about you?