You probably can't afford Victoria Beckham's 'blood' moisturiser. But would you try these?
Victoria Beckham just revealed that the secret to her younger looking skin lies in a $1,200 bottle of moisturiser. Beside the fact that the average Indian will never be able to afford a $1,200 (Rs 85,626.00) bottle of moisturiser, there’s another catch — and perhaps you’d want to read the label before you start slathering your face with it.
The special moisturiser is made with — wait for it — Victoria’s own blood!
Inner OCD kicking in in 3...2...1
The pop icon-turned-fashion designer took to her Instagram story to share a picture of her new anti-ageing lotion, created by Dr Barbara Sturm. The name ‘Barbara Sturm’ itself should ring a bell — she’s after all the name behind the beauty industry’s current favourite, the 'vampire facial'.
Victoria adds that her blood, apparently, is highly anti-inflammatory and regenerative, which inspired Barbara to suck out some and use it in this new line of products.
PS. We almost bled out on the keyboard as we wrote the above lines. (And yes, we are strangely reminded of Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose!)
But, do not be alarmed. Neither is this the grossest or weirdest of all beauty trends ever seen, nor is this the first time blood and age-defying beauty have been correlated. A ‘bleeding’ conspiracy theory in Bollywood has something to do with ‘drinking blood’ and one yesteryear actor who continues to look prettier with every passing year.
There’s no proof on that theory, though.
But Victoria has given us legit blood-chilling proof of this one.
If 2019 begins with ‘bloody moisturisers,’ 2018 rose to ‘penis facials.’ Cate Blanchett introduced us to a New York-based facialist, Georgia Louise, who gives such facials. Cate described it as something that “smells a bit like sperm.” Obviously, it would be difficult to market a thing that smells like sperm and is called the 'penis facial', so, on the company website, it is sold under the name: Hollywood EGF facial.
No. We’re not letting that ‘cum’ close to us!
The Bird Poop facial was a thing in 2017 — another darn disgusting Japanese beauty trend we don’t even want to try. Apparently, nightingale droppings can brighten, illuminate and gently exfoliate your skin, which is why the Japanese have been using it for centuries, until they decided to present this offering to the world.
No, thank you.
If poop is not your thing (and why would it be?), you can always go for the 'sheep placenta' facial.
Reportedly, it helps maintain a youthful glow — and one of the stories that did the rounds was that One Direction singer Harry Styles was a fan. He, of course, denied it vociferously. Hmm... wonder if he got sheepish about the whole thing!
Gwyneth Paltrow, however, is not sheepish. She revealed back in 2016 that she had experimented with the bee sting therapy, a beauty treatment that uses melittin, the active compound in bee venom. Unlike the above examples where products were made out of the said substances — blood, poop, sperm — the bee sting therapy is actually precisely like it sounds. Kind of like your fish pedicure — only a zillion times more painful.
Umm... we’re gonna let that bee!
The question, therefore, is how obsessed are we with beauty that we will even resort to such bizarre trends?
The answer, of course, is one on which the multi-billion dollar beauty industry is precariously balanced.