Chetan Bhagat in Delhi University English literature syllabus is wonderful for Hindu Rashtra
BC in Indian colloquial was particularly infamous and associated with crass, cuss and curse. But that was before Chetan Bhagat happened to us (yes, another BC-Before Chetan).
Now, India and Indian English have accepted and recognised the need for Bhagat style of writing and speaking, where "Deti hai to de varna kat le" (the line said by the hero in his novel Half-Girlfriend) is absolutely and grammatically correct English.
It's "simple and easy" English. And you are a "snob" if you laugh at it or cringe at the thought of using such universally accepted language.
Bhagat's English is not just "easy", but immensely popular too. So much so that soon it will be included in Delhi University syllabus.
Yes, among the new list of electives to be offered by Delhi University's English department to students from other disciplines is his Five Point Someone in the "popular fiction" course.
However, it is still up for a discussion and colleges will now decide whether this actually becomes a reality or not. Moreover, this subject will be an elective and students can decide if they want to take it up or not.
But that's so unfair. DU should instead make it a compulsory subject. And why not?
After all, Bhagat has always claimed, and rightly so, that he writes in simple English (if simple means incorrect), and that's why his books have managed to be a bridge between Indians who speak English well and Indians who speak little English.
So when you speak little English, the best way to hide your incompetency is not to learn the language, but to pepper it up with Hindi slangs or distorted words like half-girlfriend (which of course is accepted in Bhagat's Thesaurus that your university library must have already subscribed to).
Also, what's the point of reading literary greats whose political and social beliefs are not worth emulating?
It's certainly not advisable for students to read a Leo Tolstoy, for example, and get inspired to become a pacifist.
What is there to learn from the utterly boring and long Shakespearean plays? Do we really want our youths to learn about political principles that differ from the monarchy, or dictatorship, or for that matter, usurpation and tyranny or a modern republic (the only republic we are interested at present is, you know whose)?
Bhagat's breezy novels are not just easy to understand, but can also give great life-lessons in misogyny, a must-learn to survive in present-day India.
Western authors may have taught us about democracy and its values, but it's Bhagat who has "democratised the English language" for us to understand the hidden dangers of the democracy propagated by the West.
And that's exactly what people do when they love their country and culture. Moreover, Bhagat-style English also comes handy to troll people on social media (one major reason we all want to write in English these days).
Without getting into any further debate on good and bad literature, it is best to settle for Bhagat's literature and illuminate the young minds of DU.
DU, in fact, should also introduce Bhagat's non-fiction to its students, particularly his views on Ram Mandir, authors returning their Sahitya Akademi awards in protest against the Dadri lynching, and most importantly the lack of discipline in DU.
During the recent controversy surrounding DU student Gurmehar Kaur and the unrest over violation of freedom of speech, Bhagat said: "Why doesn't the NDA (National Defence Academy) have violent student political clashes? Or IIT? Or AIIMS? Because there's discipline, which DU simply doesn't have."
Bhagat can't be more right. What is the use of debating political and social justice, when it's the state that decides what is right and wrong.
Students are anyway not supposed to raise political questions; they should rather concentrate on studying, getting a job, making love, getting married and earning lots of money in Bhagat's ideal state.
And what better language to understand these ideals than distorted Bhagat English and slipshod Bollywood films (which all his novels finally get made into)? It'll open India to Hindu Rashtra.