Why Arunabh Kumar's ‘I find a woman sexy, I tell her’ is sexual harassment at workplace

Arunabh Kumar, co-founder of the comedy sketch and immensely successful media start-up, The Viral Fever, recently stunned many, first by being the alleged perpetrator of a string of sexual harassment cases carried out over two-three years; and second, by admitting to the following statement – “When I find a woman sexy, I tell her that” – as a casual display of the machismo-as-lame-excuse culture.

Kumar’s “frank admission” to the tabloid Mumbai Mirror, day after the sexual harassment charges against him surfaced in an anonymous blog post in the portal Medium, written by a 24-year-old woman who goes by the title the Indian Fowler, is basically to offset the grave accusations levelled at him as nothing but by-product of a seemingly liberal, contemporary, young and sexually charged workplace.

But, most certainly it is not. Where was, and this is crucial, the consent, the lynchpin of a modern sexual relationship? Minus which it’s the law – Sexual Harassment of Women at Workplace (Prevention, Prohibition and Redressal) Act, 2013 – which will decide.

So, here are five reasons why Arunabh Kumar’s defence is as lame as the “boys will be boys” throwback. Cringe and reject.

Firstly, being “sexy” for your pleasure isn’t why women exist in workplaces. They exist because, well they work. Exactly the same work that, and often far better than what, their male colleagues do, but are not subjected to the “You’re looking sexy today” idiocies. Nothing that you wouldn’t tell your male colleagues is okay with your female colleagues, because they are colleagues first and women later.

While men are complimented for looking smart, professional, up for the task, go-getter-attitude, like the alpha dog, dressed to lead, like a boss, etc, etc, women are complimented for “looking sexy”.

Yes, that is an end in itself, but it’s also a dead-end because professional assessment has been reduced to a woman’s bust size, or the length of her skirt, or the colour of her lipstick. Paraphernalia that are absolutely irrelevant to the work she’s doing: such as writing codes for a tech giant, penning brilliant scripts for comedy skits online, writing editorials for a media house, doing graphics for television programmes.

Please introspect, when was the last time your compliment for a male colleague came wrapped in sexual innuendoes that would make a woman uncomfortable in the very same office? 

Why do you think complimenting women sexually, that is not for the work that they are there to do, or are doing, is acceptable? No, it’s not.

Secondly, “You’re looking sexy today” is the most unprofessional exchange among colleagues and office acquaintances that should not be part of any modern workplace. Because these exchanges are usually between a powerful, older male in a dominant/senior position in the workplace – such as Arunabh Kumar, co-founder of TVF – and the recipient is a much younger, impressionable and vulnerable woman employee, often an intern or an assistant, certainly junior enough to imagine that sexually-laced sentences can even be complimentary.

Moreover, such compliments become part of work culture only when the entrenched patriarchy and ubiquitous sexism of society in general get codified as office niceties, which women must put up with if they love their jobs.

Older, senior women, who witness such disgraceful harassment unfold, most often turn a blind eye to save their own skin, or just think that it’s every woman’s trial by fire.

The line “If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen” was invented to suit such a predatory work atmosphere, in which the senior, powerful male always gets to the set the agenda and the definition of what would be acceptable in workplace and what wouldn’t be.

Turns out, these agenda-setters don’t think sexual harassment at workplace is a big deal at all. Oh wait, turns out that they don’t think anything that they do or say amounts to sexual harassment in the first place.

It’s just life as entitled, sexually predatory males as usual.

Thirdly, “You’re looking sexy today” is the tip of the casual sexism iceberg in the still waters of patriarchy in which distrust of women and misogyny run deep.

For a moment, let’s keep aside the fact that allegations against Arunabh Kumar point to sustained sexual harassment, molestation and serial offence in which not one, but at least nine different women have been so far victimised. Let’s explain how they most started with the seemingly harmless “I find the woman sexy”.

The American television series Mad Men captured very well how women in the workplaces in 1960s USA were little more than sexualised props, occupying junior positions as stenographers, secretaries and telephone attendants in companies that only had male bosses and male intermediaries.

But perhaps it’s not too much to expect sensitivity towards gender issues from contemporary media start-ups that make sharp, funny comedy sketches about the battle for equality. Or, is it?

What is the business of “looking sexy” doing in bustling start-ups that have shiny manifestoes and “about us” sections on their websites?

Why is the business of “looking sexy” the woman’s responsibility, while the man, usually her boss or employer, feels a natural urge to comment upon her physical appearance, when it has nothing to do with the work she has to do or gets done?

“Looking sexy” and being complimented for that is about shifting the responsibility from the male gaze, which is objectifying the woman in the workplace and reducing her contribution to her physical, bodily presence, to the woman who’s being objectified.

There’s nothing liberal or forward-thinking about bringing “sexiness” into the equation; if anything, this sexualisation of professional relations is about never seeing women as professional equals, and always seeing them as sexy bodies out there for male pleasure.

Fourthly, “You’re looking sexy today” isn’t the way to loosen things up in office, or thaw the ice in workplace. So, why does the liberal male often fall back on these sexist sentiments and consider this form of harassment as encouragement?

Why when the “liberal male sexual harasser”, from former US president Bill Clinton, to India’s own Tarun Tejpal and RK Pachauri episodes, come forward, is it more galling and difficult to believe than, say, a Donald Trump?

Because, unlike their conservative counterparts, many of these “liberal males” made it to the equality marches, shouted equality slogans, even helped draft laws that would make equality legally enshrined. They fight for the right causes, speak the right words and have sparkling clean public images of being champions of women.

The hypocrisy of “You’re looking sexy today” is how it usually starts. Because “You’re looking sexy today” is just a slightly more “refined” version of the locker room talk that has been sanctified for office use by the locker room boys themselves.

Because in “You’re looking sexy” is the male assertion that he has a natural right to turn a woman into a body only, and that continuing to “look sexy” might be rewarded in the scheme of things, skewing the professional, work ethic balance all over again.

Finally, the numbers of rape culture don’t lie. For example, the stats, that despite the law, about 70 per cent of women who face sexual harassment do not report it to higher authorities for the fear of consequences.

For example, according to a FICCI-EY November 2015 report, about 36 per cent of Indian companies and 25 per cent of multinational companies do not comply by the Sexual Harassment Act, 2013.

What is the basis of the Act? Here’s what, at the very least:

“[S]exual harassment results in violation of the fundamental rights of a woman to equality under articles 14 and 15 of the Constitution of India and her right to life and to live with dignity under article 21 of the Constitution and right to practice any profession or to carry on any occupation, trade or business which includes a right to a safe environment free from sexual harassment;

[P]rotection against sexual harassment and the right to work with dignity are universally recognised human rights by international conventions and instruments such as Convention on the Elimination of all Forms of Discrimination against Women, which has been ratified on the 25th June, 1993 by the Government of India…”

“You’re looking sexy” is how gendered discrimination in the workplace is perpetuated. Arunabh Kumar is that much more guilty for using his brand of faux liberalism as the ruse to routinely harass, sexually and verbally abuse his women colleagues, as per the allegations levelled by the Indian Fowler.

That’s a shame. And many of those currently criticising Arunabh, how about looking into the mirror for a change?

Also read: What the Indian male colleague doesn't get about sexual harassment at the workplace

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